Essential Support for New Parents: What a Postpartum Doula CAN and CAN’T Do
The earliest months of parenthood are a journey into the unknown. Whether you have a fussy or easily soothed baby, a peaceful or challenging birth and recovery experience, or other uncertainties, knowing the benefits of hiring a postpartum doula can transform this journey.
Will you be able to breastfeed like you hope? Will you and your partner figure out how to share baby duty in a way that makes you both happy? Will you love every moment from the very first or will it take time to feel connected to your own baby? No one knows until you’ve actually gotten into the middle of it.
And then there’s the question of whether you even really need a postpartum doula to support you during this vulnerable time in your life.
Despite the lingering stigma that postpartum help is only for the privileged, seeking such support is not a sign of weakness, neediness, or dependence. It’s a sign of wisdom, foresight, and intentionality. Everyone deserves support when they are at their most vulnerable, especially in the first 12 weeks after birth.
Is a postpartum doula worth it?
Some parents seamlessly navigate the uncertainties of the fourth trimester, finding joy in the trial and error of early parenthood. For others, the journey is daunting, and having experienced support becomes crucial. When loved ones aren't available or as helpful as promised, a postpartum doula becomes an invaluable companion.
A postpartum doula acts as an experienced guide, supporting you through recovery, baby care, and the journey to becoming the parent you envision.
It’s your privilege as the parent to look after your baby. Your postpartum doula’s commitment is to support you, the parents. Sometimes that might look like taking care of the baby, but it actually goes much deeper than baby care.
A night nurse, newborn care specialist, or nanny will prioritize newborn care for you so that you can rest and recover. But this is not the full scope of a postpartum doula’s care.
A postpartum doula provides emotional, physical, and informational support tailored to your needs as new parents, helping you build confidence and find your rhythm in this new chapter of life.
In my work as a virtual postpartum doula, that can look like spending a day together exchanging voice and text messages as we troubleshoot feeding or fussing or sleep struggles, or my 30 day All Access Doula Pass allows us to have an ongoing conversation over the course of a month as you make your way as a parent.
Postpartum doulas offer:
Emotional Support: Helping you process your birth experience, navigate the baby blues, and build confidence in your parenting abilities.
Physical Support: Assisting with light household tasks, meal preparation, and ensuring you have time to rest and recover.
Informational Support: Providing evidence-based information on newborn care, breastfeeding, and postpartum recovery, and connecting you with local resources and support groups.
This holistic approach ensures that you, as new parents, feel supported, empowered, and prepared to care for your baby and yourselves. The comprehensive care of a postpartum doula can make a significant difference in your postpartum experience, helping you transition into parenthood with confidence and peace of mind.
What a postpartum doula CAN’T do
Your postpartum doula wants to help you with all the things. That’s why they became a doula! They know how challenging these next few weeks can be and they’re committed to your comfort, recovery, and confidence. But there are limits to what they can do.
A professional, experienced postpartum doula will follow their certifying body’s code of ethics and will not perform tasks outside their scope of practice.
Medical Tasks
The majority of postpartum doulas do not have medical training and cannot conduct medical examinations, make diagnoses, offer treatment plans, or administer medication.
If you describe a new problem or symptom, your doula can only provide general information to help you decide on the next steps, such as contacting your care provider or considering over-the-counter treatments. It is outside your doula’s scope to confirm a diagnosis or advise on specific treatments.
Decision-Making
Even with the best information, your postpartum doula can’t make big decisions for you. They provide support, answer questions, and offer resources, but ultimately, you must decide how to address your challenges. You know your body and your baby best. Your doula is there to help you trust your instincts and take the next step.
This is one of the most unexpected and empowering benefits a postpartum doula provides – the empowerment that comes from being in a trusted relationship with someone who truly hears and validates your experience, guiding you to your own truth and power.
Communication
Your postpartum doula cannot speak on your behalf to your partner or medical team. They can't share your wishes or explain what you mean. However, your doula can help you prepare to communicate effectively. They’ll help you organize your thoughts and act as a sounding board as you work through your expectations and feelings.
This support empowers you to advocate for yourself and your baby with clarity and confidence, ensuring your needs and desires are understood and respected. This is exactly the kind of challenge we can tackle during a Day with a Doula, where we focus on your specific concerns and find the best next steps for you and your baby.
What a postpartum doula CAN do
The core of a postpartum doula’s role is to provide emotional, physical, and informational support to new parents. Here’s how that can look for you and your family.
Emotional Support
The emotional support a doula provides is more than just a shoulder to cry on. A good doula helps you articulate your needs and preferences, work through disappointments and hard decisions, and build confidence in your parenting abilities. They guide you through the decision-making process as you incorporate a new person into your life and weigh risks and benefits in an entirely new way.
While it makes sense to rely on close family and friends for support, complex relationship dynamics can make this challenging. In fact, inviting an outside person who has no expectations or preconceptions into this role might be even better. A doula offers unbiased support, validating your experience and guiding you to your own truth and power.
There are so many unknowns as a first-time parent, and having a compassionate person nearby to offer reassurance can make a significant difference.
Physical Support
The physical support a doula provides can vary depending on whether you hire in-home or virtual doula help. In-home doulas often assist with light cooking, cleaning, tidying, baby care, and other tasks you need help with while you recover.
Some might also help with pet care, looking after older siblings, or accompanying you to doctor appointments, or watching your newborn at home while you go to an appointment alone. Your doula can be that extra pair of hands to get things done at home.
For virtual care, physical support is limited to what can be provided via video chat, such as help with baby gear like breast pumps, carriers, or cloth diapers. Your doula can also help you reassess and prioritize tasks as your household adjusts to the new baby.
Remember, there's often an unspoken expectation that parents should manage everything on their own, but this is only because it’s "the norm," not because it's best or even possible. Having support is crucial.
Informational Support
Postpartum doulas offer invaluable informational support, especially for parents who might otherwise spend every waking moment researching answers. Doulas are trained in postpartum recovery, newborn adjustment, and the essentials needed for both parents and babies to feel supported and healthy.
A great doula is also a wealth of information about local and online resources. Whether you need a lactation specialist, a baby boutique, or mental health support, your doula knows where to find the best resources.
There's an abundance of information on newborn care, but you don't have to know all of it. Having a steady guide to show you the way can be far more beneficial than sifting through endless advice alone.
If you find it hard to get out of research mode, you will love my Fearless Fourth Trimester package. This comprehensive service includes 12 weekly video visits and anytime voice and text messaging support from the end of your pregnancy through the fourth trimester. Let me be your steady guide, helping you navigate these crucial months with confidence and peace of mind. Reach out to learn more and see how this personalized support can make all the difference for you and your baby.
How can a postpartum doula help you?
The support of a postpartum doula can make a significant difference during your postpartum recovery. Whether you need emotional support, help with newborn care, or guidance on prioritizing self-care so you can show up better for your baby, a doula provides the relief and reassurance new parents need.
Maybe you really just need an extra set of hands around the house because somehow even two adults don't seem like enough people to look after one tiny newborn (been there!).
Or maybe you have plenty of help at home, but what you need is to have access to someone you can really talk to a few times a week to help you process your feelings, fears, and worries, to get outside your own head for a bit, and to brainstorm different ways to approach a new struggle that’s just popped up (needed that!).
So if you feel like you’ve got the in-home help part pretty well covered, or it’s just not something you’re worried about, but you would feel a lot better having a compassionate, trained, and experienced doula to check in with now and again as you figure things out with this new baby, then definitely find out more about my virtual doula care options!
Grab your Newborn Care Cheat Sheet today!
Grab your baby Cheat Sheet
Have you signed up for countless baby resources and still feel overwhelmed?
Let this Newborn Care Cheat Sheet be the last one you get. The cheat sheet covers the basics of newborn development, feeding, fussing, and safe baby sleep.
Claim it now and check this bit of research off your list. Now go you can go back to scrolling through adorable baby outfit collections 😍
And don’t forget to share this post with friends who might benefit from doula support.
Related Posts
Patricia is a steady companion through the transformative journey of new parenthood. With a rich background that weaves through global travels, teaching experiences, and the personal journey of parenting, Patricia brings a unique blend of empathy, understanding, and support to her role as a virtual doula. Her approach is deeply rooted in the belief that every new parent's experience is unique, deserving of personalized guidance and support.
Through her personalized and compassionate postpartum support, Patricia is changing how families experience the Fourth Trimester. She offers both a listening ear and a guiding voice, helping new parents navigate the early stages of parenthood with calm and assurance.
Pregnant and not sure you’re ready for this baby yet? Sign up for Prepping for Postpartum now!